David J. Danto

Business travel thoughts in my own, personal opinion

eMail: ddanto@IMCCA.org Follow Industry News: @NJDavidD

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“Please Don’t Squeeze…”

When a person is caught between two opposing forces, that person gets squeezed. And, in the case of airline Carry-On bags, frequent business travelers have literally been feeling the squeeze for far too long.

This all started with the airlines’ revenue enhancing model of ‘unbundling’ – where things that used to be included in the price of an airplane ticket were extracted and charged-for separately. ‘Want to sit in the exit row? Want to check a bag? Pay-up.’ Any intelligent business traveler will tell you they’d never check a bag anyway. There are just way too many – very likely - business-trip-ruining scenarios when a business traveler stupidly separates themselves from their possessions on a flight. However, when the airlines started charging to check a bag, many of ‘the great unwashed’ - leisure travelers - stopped checking them too - to avoid paying fees. When that happened, the already packed overhead bins got even crazier. At that point the airlines started reinforcing their ‘bag sizers’ more than they ever did before. These little exports from hell facilitate the typical gate agent lie that “if your bag won’t fit in our sizer it won’t fit on the plane.” I’ve debunked and documented that BS many times in the past. The airlines are generally too dishonest to just tell you it has nothing to do with the size of the overhead bins. The reality is they just want to put arbitrary limits on what you take on the plane – so that’s what they do.

As a result, we frequent travelers have had to find ways to cope. As for me, I’ve permanently switched to a four-wheel rolling half suitcase / half duffel – the Kipling Darcey Small Printed Wheeled Luggage Carry. With its soft sides I can fit more of my stuff into it than a bag with more rigid sides. And – its main disadvantage is its main advantage – it doesn’t expand. No matter what I stuff into it, it will always fit into any sizer. To make this all work there are some items I just don’t pack. I’m forced to hit a store on slightly longer trips to buy some of the things I couldn’t fit. If I want to keep them I’ll check a spare bag on the way home – when that bag being late or lost matters less – or I’ll just throw them away at the destination (see Johnny Pillowseed for an exaggerated example.) So problem solved, right? Nope.

The crack staff at Newark’s TSA checkpoint asked to inspect my bag last time I traveled through it last week. It didn’t matter that I had Pre-Check on my boarding pass. It didn’t matter that I paid my $100 and had a background check and interview to become a Trusted Traveler under the Global Entry program. All that mattered is that they wanted to fondle my shampoo bottle and other toiletries. There was nothing wrong with them of course. After feeling-them-up they said “have a nice day” and let me close it all up. I was incredibly lucky that that trip was just three days long – and re-closing my stuffed bag was not an issue. Tomorrow however (as I write this) I’m leaving for a seven day trip. I already needed a hammer and grease to get everything I needed into the bag. If the TSA wants to fondle my shampoo again it will take hours to re-close everything in there. I’d probably have to re-pack some of the stuff into a spare nylon bag I have and check it, as it would be way too painful to try to get it all back in there at the checkpoint. Mind you, I definitely feel more safe that the TSA – who missed 70% of weapons the last time they were tested – took the time to make sure my shampoo bottle didn’t exceed 3 ounces.

So there’s the latest squeeze – incented by the airlines to bring a smaller bag (and literally jam everything in until nothing more will fit) yet incented by the TSA to pack everything loosely as they may want to rummage through all of it (regardless of any invasive check we have participated in in advance.) Clearly these two driving forces are in conflict, and we, the frequent travelers, are the ones squeezed in the middle.

How will this squeeze be fixed? I have no idea. However, I do know if you squeeze something long enough it will pop. I hope that pop is one we all don’t regret.

This article was written by David Danto and contains solely his own, personal opinions.

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