David J. Danto
Principal Consultant,
Collaboration/ AV / Multimedia / Video / UC
Dimension Data
Director of Emerging
Technology
Interactive
Multimedia & Collaborative Communications Alliance
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David.Danto@DimensionData.com Follow Video &
Technology Industry News: @NJDavidD
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Bad At Math
Sometimes I just don’t understand what’s going on at
the airlines. I mean,
I do believe that the US airline industry is rife with greed and incompetence
at the management level for all the reasons I’ve mentioned in all my past
blogs, but even with that, my day to day travel experiences still manage to
constantly surprise me. It seems that no
matter how cynical I become – no matter how much I’ve steeled myself against
the inevitable disaster my next flight experience will bring – the airlines
still manage to amaze me with a new poor experience at every opportunity. Interestingly however, I think I’ve finally
found a pattern in most of the poor experiences – a simple explanation that
just might account for all of it.
Airline management and employees must just be bad at math. A number of recent experiences have brought
me to this conclusion. Firstly, with
hundreds of planes permanently
parked in the desert and the airlines flying less planes and less flights
than ever before (just to artificially make sure that the demand for seats always
exceeds the supply) one would think that the job of getting them ready to fly
would be easier (less flights = less planes to take care of = easier
workload.) Here’s our first clue
suggesting a math problem - this logical math doesn’t add-up. But then the plot thickens further…
There is a vocabulary word that seems to
be popping up very often over the PA systems at airports recently – one that I
haven’t heard with this frequency in my three plus decades of flying. The word is reboard – as in ‘passengers
on flight xxx should make their way back to gate xxx to reboard the aircraft.’ Why reboard
you ask? Clue number two - because the
passengers were let on the flight before the math was done. In one case two weeks ago I and my fellow
passengers completely and fully boarded United 1217 in Las Vegas before anyone
on the ground or in United’s flight operations realized the crew was not at the
airport, and in fact had not even taken-off on their flight from LAX to
LAS. Simple math would have shown how
the pilots couldn’t possibly make it.
But before I get into time calculations (and believe me, I will) an even
more simple question comes-up. What ever
happened to the math involved in a checklist – just simple counting? In all my many years of flying, step 1 has
always been for the crew to board the plane to test it. I mean, I may not be an expert in aviation
engineering here, but it’s probably a good idea to ensure that there aren’t any
Pythonesque “great big holes in the roof”
and that the wings and engines are still attached. In my past three decades of flying,
passengers were let on a plane only after that check was accomplished. Well, apparently not anymore. This ‘get-on
– oops-get-off – now reboard’ has been happening a heck of a lot more
lately. For another example of it, just
last week I and my fellow passengers began boarding and getting settled onto
United 233 in San Francisco when we were told there was “a maintenance issue”
on the aircraft and that we’d have to leave.
That flight just happened to be the only 777 making that route that
day. Had it been cancelled there was no
way the remaining flights could have absorbed the overflow. As I was getting off the plane I asked the
captain and maintenance crew what the issue was (and if I should scramble to
get onto another flight.) They explained
that the captain’s chair was broken and a new one would have to be
installed. This was an aircraft that
flew into SFO the night before, and one that in fact taxied across the tarmac
that morning from an international gate to the domestic gate it was departing
from. I found it very unlikely that the
captain’s chair would work perfectly upon arrival the night before, again
perfectly when it was powering-across the taxi-way, and then again perfectly
when the crew boarded and OK’d the loading of passengers, but then
spontaneously disintegrate as the passengers were stowing their carry-ons. It’s more likely that no one felt like doing
their job and reporting it at the end of the prior day or fixing it overnight. But whatever the timing of the issue,
checking if the pilot could even sit on the plane was apparently not a step
with a lower number than boarding the aircraft.
Keep in mind those two incidents from
just this month were only from flights that I personally flew on. As I sat at a gate in Newark last week
waiting for a late arriving aircraft I must have heard that word reboard over the PA system at
least a dozen times in a two hour window. My only conclusion is that no one is
running pre-flight checklists before boarding anymore. Bad at math…
The cincher to my hypothesis comes (as
promised) in the form of time calculations.
Remember the UA 1217 flight I mentioned above – fully boarded with the
pilots still stuck in LA? Once somebody
actually discovered the problem and posted the new timings, the bad math skills
became obvious. First we were told that
the flight with our crew had finally taken off and that our delayed, new time
of departure was 6pm. However, the
airline personnel must have forgotten that we all carry smart devices and can
figure out which flight the actual inbound aircraft is. Here is a side-by-side comparison of the new
flights - screen captured within seconds of each other:
Apparently the pilot and co-pilot were
going to blow the emergency exit doors and then leap from their aircraft to the
one they would then be piloting at the next gate, and would then magically
complete pre-flights checks, board (excuse me, reboard) and depart all in two minutes. I was clearly concluding bad math at this
point – that is ‘till the next update came.
Ah…now the pilots were going to land at
6:01 and depart at 6pm (another Pythonesque reference – like waking up half an hour before they went to
bed.) I was beginning to think that
maybe it was all of the STEM
skills that may be lacking – including the lack of a fundamental
understanding of the space-time continuum.
But then they corrected the departure time to more plausible (yet still
impossible) 6:20pm. (Also, take
particular notice of the reason given for the delay - “air traffic control
conditions” instead of an inability to manage crew logistics to a professional
standard.)
The most amazing thing was, at 5:40 pm
that evening, with the pilots still at least 20 minutes outside of LAS, they
boarded the flight again anyway! No
pre-flight checklist before boarding at all.
If something was found to be wrong they’d just have shoved us poor
schleps off the plane a second time and made us reboard again. No
wonder there are so many announcements about reboarding nowadays. This wasn’t a one-off stupid move, it’s now
apparently policy to be bad at math.
I can only hope that clearer heads prevail
someday and we start running airlines by the numbers that count again, instead
of the numbers on share valuations and golden parachutes. If not, us passengers will all be needing
parachutes.
This article was written by David Danto and
contains solely his own, personal opinions.
All image and links provided above as reference under
prevailing fair use statutes.